So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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