why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
Randomize
