Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
I sent the random girl I had sex with last night a 'happy mothers day' text as a reminder to get the morning after pill.
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Randomize
