Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
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