He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
