just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
