He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
Randomize
