Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
I have post one night stand depression
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
