sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
