Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
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