perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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