OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
Randomize
