You're a womanizer and a bitch.
I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
Randomize
