Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Randomize