Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
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