'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
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