just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
Randomize
