i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
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