I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
i now understand why vodka
Never let your siblings swipe right.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
Randomize
