he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
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