Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
Randomize
