small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
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