Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
Randomize
