elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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