You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
another moral hangover. fuck.
Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Randomize
