she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
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