their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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