like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
Randomize
