I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
Randomize
