Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
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