Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Fuck appropriateness.
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize
