Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
Randomize
