did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
I hear youre working today. To keep you entertained, ive compiled a list of condiments that my dick has NOT been slathered in since last Friday: Relish, and raspberry jam. That's right.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
Success! We fucked roommates!
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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