So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
Lack of response to this text gains you a half hour of freedom before I initiate operations to conclude you are not, in fact, comatose. You requested no mercy.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
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