Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
Randomize
