Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
The dog destroyed my vibrator and swallowed several pieces. Vet gave us a laxative so now I’m checking lots of dog shit and having no orgasms. Plus the cute vet knows I don’t get enough dick, so that’s just great
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