No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
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