did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
That reminds me...we need to get swords
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize
