Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
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