i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Can't talk, ducks in the car
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize