You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
