now everythime i write "i'm" in my phone my tap9 spells out "i'm-never-drinking-again". It's trying to remind me
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
My life is pants optional.
Randomize
