you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
Randomize
