so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
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