Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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