Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
high people should be assigned attendants
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
You're a hot mess, you know that?
At least I'm a FUN hot mess. Like a train crash full of pizza, fireworks and glitter.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
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