And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
Randomize
