i just google imaged poop.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
Randomize