THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
Randomize
