Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
Randomize
