I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
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