should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
Randomize
